Time [CLOSED]

Tick, tick, tick, tick. The raven haired girl sat on the cafeteria bench, her eyes glued to the clock. Studying intently each time the second hand progressed it's way around, three hundred and sixty degrees. There was nothing interesting about that clock, there was nothing entertaining or amusing. Lilith couldn't explain it, the way she stared like her life depended on it, the way it was somehow the only thing that was keeping her calm. The tray of food sat in front of her, untouched, for she had no intent on eating it. The plastic spork was gripped tightly in the girls small hand, the limb already having taken a slight tremble to it. Though of course one would have to be paying close attention to notice.

The orderly nearby kept a close eye on the girl, having been informed of the fit she'd thrown as she was dragged in and admitted. Lilith had fought the whole way, repeatedly sedated and drugged to somehow keep her calm enough to be manageable. Now, it had been twenty four hours since any drugs had been put into her system what so ever, and Lilith was suffering. Her free hand was placed overtop of the forearm tensed from gripping the eating utensil. Her nails slowly raked and dug into her flesh, overtop of the track marks, some fresh, many scarred. Every fifteenth tick of the clock she allowed herself to press deeper, desperate to find relief from the itch to inject herself, an itch she obviously wasn't going to be able to treat.

Cold beads of sweat were pooled on the females forehead, and had already soaked through the chest of her medical gown in very few, faint places. She hadn't quite realized just how horrible she looked, one might describe it as being on the foot of deaths door. Her porcelain skin only seemed to flush more pale, her small body shaking, heavy lidded eyes rimmed with red bags that showed obvious lack of sleep, and if one recognized it her even more obvious signs of withdrawal. She was slipping, the anxiety tightening in her chest, not sure how much longer she could make it. 86,400 seconds seemed like a lifetime.

Staring at the clock left Lilith very little room to appraise those who might be around her, maybe even sitting by. As far as she knew and acknowledged, she was alone. Horribly alone. It didn't quite matter if the room was filled with bodies or even if eyes lingered on her for longer then a moment. She wouldn't notice, not quite yet. Then again she more often then not seemed to be in her own little world, one that ran off of seconds, not minutes, hours, or even days.

"You should eat your meal properly!" Came a squeaky voice as a tattered courdroy bunny plopped into the table beside the dark haired girl. Poor thing looked as if it had been dragged through the apocalypse and back again. One of its eyes was missing and had been replaced with a silver button while it's tail bore the scars of several reattachments. If it had anything going for it, it was that the damn thing looked loved to death.

The voice had obviously come from the scowling man that now hovered with his hands stuffed in the pockets of his pristine white jacket next to her table. His honey colored eyes watching carefully from a guarded expression. An enigma, this man. The gesture was kind and open hearted and yet his face and posture remained passive and scary.

His attention was momentarily drawn towards the orderlies as they blatantly neglecting their jobs. Who ran this circus anyway?

Turning back towards the girl he gestured towards the stuffed rabbit. "Anita's right. You should eat".

Of course even with the movement around her, Lilith went unmoving. Her vacant, tired eyes stayed motionless, glued to the clock as each second passed and slipped right by her. However, something strange happened when suddenly a high pitched voice entered the girls ears. The faint movement of something being sat next to her entered her peripheral vision, and it was for some reason the one thing that seemed to break the girl out of her spell.

Slowly enough the raven haired girl peeled her eyes away from the clock, though they would never meet the culprit of where the voice actually came from. Instead they simply fell upon the stuffed toy, and if Lilith at that moment hadn't felt so close to death, she might of even expressed the faintest bit of a smile. The way the bunny had been tattered and put back together again with obvious care only appealed to the girl even more so.

Actually, the connection Lilith had with the toy ran far deeper then one could really express. The thing was, not too long ago, she'd had one just like it. Even the way the eye had been replaced had been so eerily familiar, some strange sense of calm at that moment washed over her. Deep down, Lilith knew this wasn't her rabbit, it'd been left on the bench in the park she'd been sitting at moments before she'd had an episode. Moments before she'd waken up vacant of what had happened and being carted off to this place.

Even when the much larger man addressed her in his own voice this time, the girls attention was solely on the stuffed animal. Only was it for the fact that he addressed the toy by name that Lilith allowed a small fragment of trust to momentarily form so she could turn his way. Her jaw hung open lazily, her tired features trying to form surprise but it just wasn't there.

Small hands outstretched quickly and trembling digits tried to wrap around the tattered animal to pull it into her own arms. "Mine." She declared like there was simply no other option. The proposition of food was long gone in her head.

A deep, guttural sound made its way from Raphael's throat. It may have been the birth of a laugh, however it stopped just as suddenly as it started. The corners of his mouth perked for a moment. This was not quite the reaction he had been expecting.

Raphael wouldn't be boasting when he admitted he worked well with children. He had a soft spot for them after all. His own childhood hadn't been difficult per say, but he did wish there would have been someone like him he could have talked to during those years. It was much easier to get those pure emotions out from a shell that hadn't had 25 years to harden.

"I don't think Anita will have a problem with that," His voice was quiet and gravelly. It suited his appearance. He swung his legs around the bench to sit opposite of her, his elbows casual on the tabletop while the fingers of both hands intertwined. "But before I go ahead and give away my beloved rabbit, I'd like to know who I'm giving her to?" There it was! Something in his expression changed just slightly enough to be inviting - trustworthy.

The dull sound of footfalls announced my presence in the cafeteria as I had just cleared the serving line, looking less than thrilled at the idea of hospital. Especially crazy hospital food. The light white fabric of my uniformed legs brushed up against one another as I carelessly made my way across the room, dark chocolate orbs narrowed at the doctor and the female seated at a far table across from the clock. It was about time I found some staff to talk to around here. I needed answers, and fast. Without a care in the world I stopped just before the duo, obnoxiously dropping that plastic tray with a clatter against the table and with such a careless attitude about it that my hands even stayed splayed open while its contents - food and utensils alike – bounced and shifted almost as if I dared one of them to say something about it. Talk about invading a conversation. I however wasn’t that close to the two, I left some spaces between us. Mainly because I didn’t want anyone in my own bubble.
Slowly sinking into a seat my hands reached for the plastic spoon (apparently they didn’t trust us with real silverware) and I dared shear off the tip of the pile of mashed potatoes, looking at the offending white mush as one corner of my lips tugged upwards in distaste. And then I tasted it. Nope. I set the spoon down with a quiet sigh before reaching for the deep red of the apple, rolling the fruit in between my palms before breaking its skin with a crunch and crooked teeth. At least they couldn’t fuck fruit up with a chef.

My eyes never faltered though, staring darkly at the two as they gushed over some busted ass teddy bear. You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.

"... ... ..."

Sober.

Today was quite uneventful, as Haru had lost his high and had at his mercy, the full workings of his mind. And that, to him, was incredibly boring. So boring in fact, that he was driven to hunger, which he could sometimes avoid. But the days like this were limited, so he might as well prove himself to be a human being to the rest of the hospital.

He handled himself quite well when not fucked up, to be honest. His strides were clear, and his posture was proper. His hair was still slightly messy and wavy, but what could you do? He wore his coat, as to not get mixed in with the patients- though he was certain many associates of his already grouped him with them.

Eyes darted over the heads of hair sprouted all over the cafeteria as he strode up to the counter, flashing a traditional grin to whatever miserable soul was lucky enough to be working it today. They must have recognized him, as they immediately shirked back a step. He must have worked on them in the past. Or perhaps, shared a bit of his vision with them.

"Hello there." He leaned forward over the counter and awkwardly close, before pointing to several pieces of fruit and a roll with butter. He glanced up again and stared. "I would like one of each of those." He gave them a sideways smile. "Please." They couldn't have thrown it to him faster. Just like that, it was bagged up and handed over. He never ate with anyone else, and most knew that.

As he walked away, he caught a glimpse of a towering doctor and his stuffed toy, coddling some patient. More importantly, he noticed that patient's track marks on her forearm. Well hello there. He paused where he was and simply watched from across the room, dropping his free hand into his pocket to press the pads of his fingers into the binding of his notebook.

Obviously he didn't think it was strange to stop and stare. He thought most of what he did was revolutionary anyways.

If the newcomer had expected a reaction from him he wouldn't get it, just the slow slide of light brown eyes and a barely noticeable tilt of the head. With his hands still folded together he allowed his index fingers to press against his bottom lip, taking quick mental notes of the interloper.

His appearance wasn't unruly so he was likely self aware - he knew where he was, understood what others thought of him (probably didn't care, however). His intense stare and body language blatantly defiant, challenging, and aggressive. He likely held contempt for authority. Possible daddy problems. Drugs? The angle he sat at wouldn't allow him to see clear enough though, that too, was also most likely.

In his head he was always ticking off the list of possibilities with these kids. Most hailed from similar backgrounds but each were different and would need different methods to crack them open and expose what was inside. It was challenging but he enjoyed the journey he shared with them.

He let the silence drag on, hoping this boys sudden appearance wouldn't clam up his current patient. However, if the kid wanted to talk, he'd have to initiate it.

I chewed wordlessly myself, catching the faint glance the intern had offered me as I propped my elbows up against the table and rolled the fruit back and forth between my hands like I was waiting to be properly regarded. Ether that, or I did have at least some sort of manners, and I was waiting for a proper breach in the current conversation between him and the girl before butting in. I didn’t stop staring, however, and so I completely missed out on any other staff or patients coming through the cafeteria. Dark eyes fixated on the pair, ears tuned in just in case whatever they were talking about was interesting or not. The chances of her actually being mentally unstable were high, though after the first couple of people I’d met outside in the court yard, it would seem like we all were pretty sane and this place was just jacked up.

That, or everyone else was lying to me. I paused in thought, this idea just now dawning over me. The apple was pressed against my teeth but I didn’t take a new bite just yet, instead my mind was bustling with the probabilities that the others were just as whacked as they were supposed to be, and now again, I felt a tiny nag in the pit of my stomach of unease.

Maybe I watched too many movies. Maybe people in Psychiatric Hospitals weren’t as scary as they always made them out to be in horror films and shit.
Crunch.

Oh, this was bad. It was already a lucky day for the doctor the way Lilith had spoken to him at all. More often then not she automatically assumed those around her were out to get her and had no problem acting accordingly. But yes, a simple thing such as a stuffed toy had for the time being captured her attention, and the source of the small glimpse of comfort it'd offered had been thus far okay in her book. Let's not focus on the fact it'd literally only been a few seconds.

If Lilith hadn't had her small hands wrapped so tightly around the tattered toy that she had just so greedily claimed, she could of moved to wipe the beads of cold sweat that had formed on her forehead. Instead she simply craned her neck to the side, burying her face in her shoulder to wipe them away, her teeth chattering in an aggressive chill that took wrath over her and she could not seem to shake.

"Anita." She repeated, more for herself then anything as if she were memorizing it. Her eyes lingered on the towering figure of the man for a moment longer before they just as easily refocused on the toy, her orbs piercing through it like she was searching for answers to questions that no one else could comprehend. When the doctor rebottled her however, searching for her name, just as quickly as she'd looked away, her attention shot back. Her features knit tightly together, brows furrowed as if she were angry. "Mine." It was too late, she had already made her claim. "Lil-" she'd started to actually respond, surprisingly enough, the prospect of being rewarded tempting enough to make her actually speak up in a hoarse, tired voice.

Company had arrived, however, so Lilith never finished her name. Personal space or not, the rattling of the tray crashing into the table seemed magnified in her head, every nerve shot as the torture of withdrawal lingered in her veins. The girl seethed, her tired face barely able to form a scowl but it was there. For a moment she was just simply fixated on the newcomer out of annoyance, his movements almost in slow motion, even as he took the apple to his lips. Something about him made Lilith angry but she wasn't quite sure why. "Get." She ushered in a tense mumble simply as if he were a stray dog begging her for her lunch. However, it'd come out much quieter then she'd intended. God she felt ill. Her small window of attention was being filled at the moment by the face across from her, any others with eyes for the group having gone unnoticed for the time being.

Crossing his arms over his chest, he watched this all play out in front of him. Boy, she was withdrawing hard from whatever she was taking. Meth? Heroin? Cocaine? Whatever it was, it certainly wasn't pretty.

As she death-held that rabbit, Mori's eyes fell instead onto the man who clearly wasn't a part of their little clique, but sat their anyways. He didn't seem too interesting, to be honest. He seemed rather normal, and he likely was. That being said...

His strides were rather clear as he moved to hover over the patient, looking down at his wild tufts of short black hair. Craning down, he held his hands up in case this man wanted to fight. "Hello there." His voice wasn't necessarily melodic by any means, but it was thick and easy to listen to. His guard was up in case the other male swung at him due to surprise, irritation, or both.

If he didn't swing, but was paying attention, Mori would have continued. "I know why you're here." He grinned wickedly at the patient and stood back up again, grasping his shoulder lightly. "Come with me. Bring what food you want." And with that, the doctor began to walk away.

Shit. His hands squeezed together momentarily when he realized he might lose her. He opened his mouth to speak but clamped it shut again taking note of the thin figure that swept up to the table. Raphael scrutinized him. This must be the infamous Dr. Mori, the one he'd been told about in wild rumors, twisted conspiracy theories and eyewitness accounts. Gossip flowed through the walls here like currency and contraband. He was curious as to how much might be true.

His attention snapped back to the young girl. Lil... could be Lillith, Lillian, Lily. "You don't have to pay attention to them!" Raphael wasn't a ventriloquist. He made no attempts to hide or downplay the fact that Anita's voice came from his throat. The girl didn't need to be lied to, but she needed someone or something to talk to. "You can tell me your name!" The rabbit squeaked.

Anita was a project he dreamt up in his second year of med school. Friendly faces were simply much easier to talk to. Cute animals were even more ideal. If a patient could speak more comfortably to a corduroy rabbit than his frowny face, he'd take that as a small victory.

My brow climbed higher and higher still in puzzled disbelief as I just stared at this woman, clutching the destroyed plush as if it were her very lifeline. She looked a definite wreck. Teeth chattering against one another, covered in a cold sweat... Ugh. If anything I guess I should have been reassured that this accursed institution at least did have real disturbed patients needing tending to, and that they weren’t entirely a shady dealing pulling in completely working peoples such as myself for profits.

It seemed she finally noticed me however, and I just silently sat there, wordlessly judging as I chewed the succulent fruit behind my lips from across the way. My own dark chocolate hues met with the woman’s much lighter orbs in that unwavering stare, almost like an unspoken challenge I wasn’t about to back down from. Not that I figured a girl – especially one in her terribly obvious physical and mental condition – would pose much of a threat. Get? I scoffed, shaking my head and speaking up around a mouthful of food rather… rudely. Where were my manners? “I need to talk to your friend.” And not the damn teddy bear. Fingers holding that apple pointed at the doctor in his fancy get up while my hues shifted, chewing loudly. The doctor apparently was having none of my shit as he continued to squeak out in an obnoxious tone as if he was the fucking rabbit. I rolled sharp eyes – just in time to hear another voice coming up from behind me.

I did jump somewhat, jerking away instinctively as I dragged that tray along with me. Even if the food wasn’t all that appetizing. I quickly took in this newcomers attire and swagger, very quickly realizing that he also was a member of staff. Thank the fucking gods, it was about time I found someone around here to talk to. Of course he knew why I was here. He worked here. And then he touched me. I shrank away with a squirm, before returning my attention to the female in my company. My forced company, to be technical. She clearly didn’t like me. Instead I flashed her a sweet, albeit rather sarcastic grin past a clusterfuck of teeth, practically cooing at her.

“Nevermind sweetheart. I see you’re into furries.” I winked playfully then, before pulling away from that table and taking my apple with me as I followed after this new Doc.

I left the rest of my tray for someone else to clean up after. Food wasn’t that grand.

Well, he didn't get punched. That was good, at least. Mori was very quickly discovering that he was not the craziest of the doctors here. Whoever thought so, didn't open their eyes wide enough. The feeling of this big shot squirming away to Haru's touch made him smirk.

All bark, no bite. Or maybe he was smart enough not to do anything to a doctor. Mori leaned against the door leading down a hallway, waiting for the rather short male to join him. Haru wasn't much taller though, only a handful of inches really. When that male joined up with him, the doctor pushed off the wall and began leading the way towards the patient rooms. "Where is your room?"

A shameless, cold scowl scowl lingered on the girls lips. It took an actual effort to form it, but oh it was there, and there was no sign of it going away anytime soon. Heavy lidded eyes stayed forward to pierce through the one staring at her. Lilith didn't know why but he was a threat, and the girls one track mind wanted nothing more for him to leave, just as she'd simply requested.

At the moment, the rabbit and it's rightful owner were one and the same in her mind. What? After all, it was where the voice was coming from. So for Lilith it didn't quite matter that the man hadn't been talking about the stuffed toy. His need to talk wasn't going to be met as long as she could help it. "No, mine." She spoke again, a bit louder this time, her voice laced with agitation. Her lips pursed yet again as if she were about to speak more, though the presence of a new face - another of authority - shut the girl right up again. Her chest tightened with anxiety, not liking the realization of how many people were actually near.


Furries? What did that even mean? Her gaze flicked back and forth rapidly between the two, trying to keep up with their conversation and the racing thoughts in her own head. Surely it was an insult. The girl had said little up to this point, her verbal communication repetitive and simply for the time being. It had been probably a feat of luck that the two had then soon after started to walk off, her patience wearing thin. Only the voice of the rabbit actually stopped her from completely losing her cool.

Slowly enough her eyes peeled back to the stuffed toy in her hand, and a small, apologetic smile crossed her lips through chattering teeth. A few fingers ran lazily over the material of the animal while she debated if she should infect answer it's request. After a long moment of silence she did eventually speak up, her voice rather toned down, no regard for the voice actor of the toy at the time being. "My name is Lilith."

Lilith was intriguing. Raphael watched her movements very carefully. Every quirk of her mouth, brush of her fingertips, blink of her eyes. Everything seemed both calculated yet spontaneous, but most of all terrified. He caught those small glimpses of hope that crossed her face as she spoke to Anita and caught himself on the verge of smiling.

Knowing her name made all the difference. He wanted her chart and notes. He wanted to know her story and what made her tick. Of course that went without question for all his patients but there was a sense of urgency with Lilith. As if she may disappear if he didn't crack the shell and free her from herself as quickly as possible. She seemed so completely and utterly... frail.

His fingers fished around in the breast pocket of his jacket where he found a small notepad and pen, scrawling out keywords and thoughts in handwriting that was virtually unreadable. "Lilith is a pretty name! How are you feeling, Lilith?" Light glinted off Anita's button eye. Clever little bunny.

Now that it had seemed the temporary moment of interruption had passed, things around her quieting down, her shoulders somewhat lowered themselves, relaxing. By no means was she feeling great, however, the sickness of withdrawal taking over her body pretty badly. It was more or less she was trying to cope with it, trying to manage any way she could. What other option was there? It had honestly been a wonder she hadn't completely lost her cool yet. Most likely because she just simply did not have the energy.

The rabbit had now since replaced the clock, holding all of Lilith's attention. Her heavy eyes simply focused on the toys replaced one, her breathing shallow as her head stayed ducked down, it feeling too heavy to even lift any longer. Dark locks hung loosely around her face in a messy fashion, some coated with the sweat that had been lingering on her forehead. She didn't bother to move them.

Even though of course she had a conscious realization that the man was in fact voicing the rabbit, it didn't quite seem to matter at the moment. He was simply the communicator, after all. Anita was real, and as the toy pressed on bringing up the subject of how she felt, her lips fell into a flat line again. She was forced to think about it, to acknowledge it, just how ill she was at the moment. It would not have been visible most likely considering how low her chin seemed to be ducked but slowly enoug her bottom lip jutted out just over the top, forming a bit of a pout as the shakes moved through her. A few silent seconds later before she could be heard sniffling and fresh water rolled down her cheeks. It was a non verbal response, clearly she felt awful.

The girls obvious pain was heartbreaking and maybe even a little unbearable. Her physical state was tattered enough, it was hard to imagine the mental turmoil she must have been going through. Leaning back, Raphael motioned to get an orderly's attention, silently mouthing that he was in need of his patients chart and information.

"It's okay Lilith, it's okay to cry. Keep holding me tightly," Anita chirped in a comforting voice. The doctor felt helpless for the next few minutes until her information was brought to him. Skimming the page, he was disappointed, but not surprised. It'd been at least twenty-four hours since anyone had checked up on her. Of course she was suffering.

Once again the minutes ticked by as he set the same orderly on a task of retrieving some medicine for him. Once he returned, Raphael chewed his bottom lip. He wanted to coax her into taking the medicine voluntarily and to do so he'd need the right words to put into Anita's mouth. Absently swirling he pills around the clear dosing cup they came in, he spoke up.

"Lilith, if you can, will you trust Dr. Gives Light to help you? He has medicine that will help you feel much better!"

It was more then unbearable if one would ask. Of course, maybe the female was a bit bias, bitter at the circumstances she'd been forced to surround herself with. Not really a fan of being open in any form just as quickly as the raven haired girl started crying, one hand slipped off of the stuffed toy to dig under her hair and rub at her eyes messily. Sniffling she forced herself to quickly try and close off, crying would certainly only make things worse, after all.

When the 'toy' spoke up however she blinked a few times to clear her vision, a chill going down her spine as her teeth seemed to repeatedly rack together with a shiver. Nonetheless, a small motion of her head showed she understood.

It'd seemed for the time being she had almost forgotten the doctor was even there. Or rather she was tolerating his presence under the circumstances that she yet again could not control. When he was yet again pointed out though, her own teeth dug into her bottom lip in worry and slowly she craned her neck, lifting her head just barley enough to catch a glimpse of the man. Lilith watched him suspiciously for a moment, obviously unsure. "For what?" She mumbled, though oddly enough didn't speak to the rabbit this time.

Raphael leaned forward against the table and cautiously reached for the girl's napkin that had been discarded along with her lunch. He moved slow and deliberately as not to frighten her. Once the napkin was in his possession, he proceeded to dump the pills out onto it. His fingertips picked up a blocky white pill and held it out for her to see. This time, he spoke in his own voice.

"This is alprazolam, also known as Xanax. It's a benzodiazepine drug that's used to help treat anxiety and depression. This will also help ease those chills," He stated before picking up the other rounded pill. "This isiso-butyl-propanoic-phenolic acid, also known as Ibuprofen," with that he pulled the corners of his mouth up in a small grin. "This will help with the aches and pains you're feeling. After that, I will also recommend you eat your lunch. Having something in your stomach will calm the empty feeling. It's still going to be rough, Lilith. The next few days are going to be hell, but I promise this will help you and you'll get through your withdrawal and feel better than you have in a long time. You don't have to like me, but I ask that you trust me on this."

What had just seemed like seconds after the words had rolled from her tongue, the man had gone to work. Her eyes followed lazily, trying to keep up with what he was doing as his hands moved towards her napkin. Naturally she tensed, inching herself ever so slightly away from what was happening but surprisingly enough, made no real efforts to jump or move away. Though she did her best to pay close attention to what was going on, more often then not her eyes would avert away, back to the plush toy in her hands, using it as a distraction.

When the pill was placed out though, she made a point to look at it, her gaze even flickering back up to meet the mans as he started explaining in detail and large words about just what he was trying to give her. Already half lidded eyes narrowed even more so in a barely noticeable animation of suspicion, not sure if she was buying it.

Trust him? The way he had spoken had made it sound so effortless. It was honestly rather appalling to hear at that point, a small huff of air blew from her nose in disbelief. Lilith was quiet for awhile, weighing her options. When it came down to it at this point, what could it hurt? She was pretty sure she was dying either way. Call her overdramatic, whatever.

A few glances exchanged back and forth between pill and the man before hesitantly enough a shaky hand was moving forward to pick them up, both at once. Lunch? That on the other hand had her nose wrinkling up.

Somehow she'd managed to shove the pills into her mouth without dropping them, though it was a close call. Her throat was dry but she made no movements to grab a drink, instead just forced the familiar looking pills down.

"How long til I drop dead?" She mumbled, no trace of humor of course, though believe it or not she was actually joking.