Cornered [OPEN]

I did not like this at all.

And that was clearly evident by how I was curled up in the corner right now.

Someone had to have given me some sort of sedative or something because the last thing I remembered was being told that I was going someplace where I could be kept safe, getting angry, then waking up in this room. It was too empty, and I didn't like anything about it. I barely even remembered what I'd done to get here, but it was slowly falling back into place. My head really hurt, though. It was throbbing, and I let it drop slightly as I closed my eyes to keep my eyes from the light. That made it feel a bit better.

An idle thought of how I should be thankful that he protected me made me shake my head as I pulled my knees up to my chest.

"Shut up, Wonsik," I mumbled, eyes still closed as I decided to lean my head back against the wall. Thankful that he protected me? Never. I would never be thankful when all he did was hurt the people worse than they were going to hurt me. I sighed softly.

This was all very complicated.

I rubbed my neck idly, almost massaging it to try to relieve even a bit of the pain of the headache. It wasn't particularly working, however, and I ended up just dropping my head to my knees again, still curled up in the near empty room.

Kirito was quite positive that most of the staff around here dilly-dallied until their little heads rolled right off of their shoulders. It seemed that the patients he visited since his transfer had been here for days without seeing a proper doctor, so Kirito wasn’t about to waste any time with the new ones checked in.

That door opened and closed behind him, stack of papers in his hands resting against a wooden clipboard as he flipped through.
Before him stood a man in a proper pressed suit rather than the doctor’s lab coats, his laminated badge hanging off of a lanyard clipped to the bottom lapel. Gloved hands clicked the pen in fingertips before he began scrawling down notes, a dark chocolate eye glancing up to eye the curled up body against the farthest wall.

This would certainly prove interesting.

The doctor cleared his throat before speaking out. “Hongbin?”
He had a slight accent, dark hair pulled over his left eye while the other focused. Visual diagnosis… unsocial. Timid. “I am Doctor Murata. Let’s talk… shall we?”
He wasted little time, still keeping his distance from the kid as he stood with his back facing the door. One never knew how unstable mental patients were. “How long have you suffered from DID, and why haven’t you seen anyone about it before?” He was diagnosed, and yet wasn’t on any medications?

I looked up when the door opened, blinking as I tried to take in everything about the man that had just stepped into my cold, clinical excuse for a room. He was... intimidating? But at the same time he wasn't. It was just nice to see another human being. I'd been cooped up in here, not really eating or walking around.

When spoke I just stared at him for a moment, eventually nodding hesitantly when he asked to talk. I usually didn't enjoy talking but to a doctor I guess I had no choice. And this man looked so official I couldn't complain. Instead I just rested my head on my knees, gaze shifting downward as I sighed.

"I don't know," I answered quietly, honestly not really remembering when it fully began. It was a long time ago. "My parents didn't agree and said I was just acting out. They're very traditional, I guess." I looked up at the man in front of me, still a bit intimidated.

He looked... different than the other doctors. So fancy.

He didn’t know. The man wrote down in his notes as his gaze lowered, continuing on with his verbal questions as the pen scratched at the paper against plastic. “So… self-diagnosis.” He said flatly, no expression in particular crossing his features. “And your depression and anxiety you assume stem from this.”

He looked up, watching the way the male didn’t move as he answered. “Explain why you assume you suffer from this. How does it happen, what seems to trigger it?”

I nodded. This man was stern, was... pretty strict-looking... Considering the house I came from, this was pretty normal. My parents had always been strict, so I could handle this. But still, he was new and I didn't know what to do around him and so I stayed where I was, biting my lip nervously.

"I..." I blinked a few times, swallowing deeply and feeling my fingers twitch a bit as I looked away from him in thought. Did he think I was lying? I certainly wasn't, and that was pretty clear. Eventually I looked back to the doctor, head cocked slightly.

"Situations," I replied, nodding. "Touches, certain words, certain moods... They talk to me," I added softly, gaze shifting down and centering on my hands as I played idly with my fingers. "I can't remember some things because they just... take over..." It was so hard to explain...

The soft pause caused Kirito’s brow to climb higher in curiosity, tapping the end of his pen with subtle clicks against his clipboard in anticipated waiting. Situations. Great. What a descriptive answer. As Hongbin continued, the doctor tipped his own head to one side acknowledging that he spoke.

“Who talks to you.” His personalities, he assumed. May as well figure out if they’ve got names. “What situations can you remember seem to trigger? Any words I specific?”

I thought for a moment, scratching an itch on my arm as I hummed slightly. I didn't want to explain all of this - I didn't really like talking a lot anyway, and this always took a lot of explanation. So I just tapped my foot on the ground, looking down at it.

"Wonsik... Comes out when I'm threatened I guess... Or whenever he wants, when he says he thinks I'm threatened... Or if something happens that makes him mad." I swallowed deeply. "He's always mad, though." It might not have been noticeable, but there was a slight twitch as I spoke. I guess he didn't like that I was talking about him.

Go figure.

"And... Sookyoung tries to help. She cares about me." That was probably a bit of an exaggeration - she cared more about herself than me. "But she just... she shows up whenever I'm..."

My voice trailed off. This was embarrassing. I didn't want to talk about this.

"... She shows up when I need to forget something... Or if she... sees someone she likes," I added in a mumble. "Or if I get really emotional." I nodded to myself, though it was more in reassurance than anything else. "I don't even know what she does half the time. Or what he does..."

This situation was so confusing. Explaining it was confusing. I was confusing. And now I had a headache. I massaged my temple slightly, eyes closed.

Kirito made a tiny sound passed pressed together lips as he continued to write down notes, the pen making soft scrawling sounds against the clipboard. Perfect. It’s been a while since he had to treat someone this seriously… demented. Though he’d have to weed out if this kid was simply a factitious cry for attention. If his parents weren’t concerned and he hadn’t seen a professional until now it sure screamed it. The faintest of smirks tugged at his lips. If he did actually suffer, which would be extremely rare, it must have been brought on by trauma… of which in his paperwork read about school bullying. Otherwise he seemed like a normal boring patient.

“Were you abused sexually?” The question came without lingering.

I watched the man in front of me write with a timid fascination, not sure if I should be worried about what was being jotted down on that piece of paper or not. I even saw the smirk, which made me feel even more uncomfortable, and there was a faint whisper in the back of my mind that I should sneak a peek at the notes.

Instead, however, that question arose and I paused, breath hitching uncomfortably in the back of my throat. Had I ever been... what?

I stuttered out a few syllables before swallowing deeply and taking in a quick breath a moment later. How could he ask a question like that so casually? Then again, I guess he had been trained to be able to talk to patients, to weed out the truth and get stuff figured out.

I might have been bullied at school, and maybe I had been bullied a bit more than I told everyone, but... I didn't even know how to answer this, I didn't want to answer this at all. I didn't even want to be here, this was starting to get too stressful. I barely liked talking, much less about myself and my personal life, and now I was being asked questions like this?

"He probably won't be able to answer you," I mumbled, posture visibly softening as I looked back up. "That kind of stuff isn't exactly common knowledge." I held up my finger to my lips with a gentle smirk, signaling the other man to quiet down. "Doesn't really remember, anyway."

There was a long pause before I stood finally, sitting down on the bed and pulling both legs to cross in front of me.

Hongbin needed a break.

Hongbin would have very little luck trying to sneak any sort of timid glances at the doctor’s paperwork. Not to mention that the boy was curled up in a ball across the entire room and Murata stood tall, beside the door. Not that the rooms were very spacious.

A single dark eye focused unwaveringly at the male when he stuttered in response to the surprising query, listening and waiting for an answer. When it came, it was not one Kirito was expecting… though he really should have been what with the self-proclaimed diagnoses that were written on his papers.

Was he just hushed? His brows arched in a show of unamusement, but he continued anyway. Common knowledge. Did it or did it not happen? Kirito sighed somewhat but continued to show his professionalism. “Yes or no, Hongbin.”

He did make it a point to speak directly with the patient and his main personality. It’s all apart of the process, even if... Kirito's direction was a little askew.

I narrowed my eyes up at the doctor in front of me, one brow arched and lips pursed together tightly. If he wasn't going to call me by my name I wasn't going to answer him, that was all there was to it.

He might be a doctor and have some authority around here, but he didn't have to be disrespectful.

I looked away, letting out a little huff of a sigh and staying silent for a long moment. Silence wasn't a thing that I was a fan of though and eventually I dropped onto the bed on my back with another huff, finally looking back at the doctor.

So serious, this one...

"... Hongbin had a lot of stuff happen to him in school," I murmured, being a bit more serious. Hongbin didn't need to hear this - as easygoing as I was, I was still protective over him. "Bullies, harassment... Some of it was very sexual..." I admitted softly, looking down. "And that's not my name," I added, mostly as an afterthought. People usually did this to me, anyway.

The doctor seemed less than amused as he watched the boy seated in front of him, however his facial features were mostly unchanging. Dark eyes were hard to read and pinpoint what thoughts were running through his head. The silence pulled at length and Kirito simply stood, unmoving, waiting. Patience…

Some days he had a lot of it, and others it was best not to test him.

When the answer finally came Kirito scribbled a few more notes away on the paper, letting the flow of ink sound softly. “So… yes.” The bullying was already down on paper. He was curious about sexual abuse. Pressing thin lips together he continued. Especially after that little come back about the name.
“My records show your name as Hongbin Lee, so I shall refer to you as such.” The faintest pull of a sadistic smirk tugged at one corner of his mouth, but in the fleeting moment that it showed up, it was gone almost as quickly. As Kirito looked over the scribble of words, phrases, and questions before him his bottom jaw worked briefly in what could almost be pinpointed as a frown, but again, it disappeared fast. “Tell me about your… orientation. Does it change with these 'personalities'? What is your.. experience?”

I rolled my eyes, rolling onto my side and propping my head up with my hand. He was going to refuse to call me by my actual name, and that wasn't going to change. I could tell. But I wasn't going to get anywhere with trying to get him to agree to actually say my name so I gave up, looking him up and down with a soft sigh.

"Experience? Orientation?" I couldn't help but sigh, lips pursed as I narrowed my eyes at the other man. Was the orientation thing really needed? It didn't matter. "I like men. Hongbin... Doesn't even know what he likes." I let out a little huff, looking the man up and down.

"It's a long story..." I said, head cocked slightly. To be completely honest, I'd never told this story and it wasn't something I was positive on telling to begin with. There was a long pause before I sighed, turning over onto my stomach. "This kid at his school... I don't know if I can tell this..."

Usually I was okay at telling stories, at explaining things, but this... This wasn't easy... I burrowed my head into my pillow, shaking it.

"I can't..." I mumbled, eyes closed.